I can slowly feel myself growing colder.
I think I have been through a number of things in my life so far that have made me a much stronger person. Growing up, I always struggled with being the “cry baby” or in other words (better words) over-sensitive to a lot of situations. My emotions, at times, seemed to be cranked all the way to 100 compared to other kids my age. I would cry at the smallest things and I really did react as if the words were hurting like sticks and stones breaking my bones. I carried that sensitivity all throughout my childhood and some even still into young-adulthood.
Though I view the sensitivity and emotional nature as both a weakness and a strength, it seems to have become less and less of an issue lately. Meaning that I have become less and less sensitive and emotional. I mostly blame that on the last 5 and a half months of my life.
First, and this is all I will say about it…
I am now single as of these past few weeks. Quick update for you, seeming that the status of my relationship has changed back and forth for far too long, it is done for good. Quote me on that too.
Over this past Christmas, I found out that my parents were on the course for divorce, which unfortunately happens too often between couples. But, we do not need to get into any other details. That isn’t the focus of this post anyway.
In any case, what I am taking away from all of this so far is that life is a bitch. I am accepting what is happening and taking it one day at a time. I think I grow stronger everyday knowing that I am one day closer to normal again.
Unfortunately, I think these major events in my life lately have turned me colder, more numb, and borderline careless. I don’t know if that is my subconscious trying to protect myself from much worse emotional distress or what but I am pulling through. Hanging on. Somehow.
If anyone of you lovely readers have gone through a similar situation right now, know that you’re not alone. I think I struggled with that most in the beginning. I felt completely alone and felt that nobody could understand but that is not true at all. There are more people out there who share similar struggles to yours and who can help.
Thank you for reading, I know I haven’t posted in a while but I hope you can forgive me! I’m thinking of a fun post to put up and share with you all soon!!